Thursday, July 19, 2012

This Monster That Only I can See..


My heart is tickin'.. like fast, not slow pace, it's like, I gotta push my way to the top, at like full pace. This isn't fear that you see on my face.. my life Is a contest and I'm gone win this race! Been held down, beat up, punished and bruised.. done with that part of my life.. of feeling used and abused.. this is not a story, but I'm here to report the News..

I have little friend's, humph.. those are Far's and few's.. before I leave this earth..I got's to pay my dues!! There has been some people, that I know I'll never forget, some that were true to me and those memories.. I have no regrets!

There have been those, I swear who meant me harm, alot of thing's that have been said and done, is sure to cause you alarm! I've been dragged and beat, thrown to the wolves to eat, left weak, couldn't speak.. and then told by other's to turn the other cheek! My life certainly was no walk in the park.. For many of year's I lived in fear of the dark.. scared to face reality, because my reality was not fair, my reality was as if I had been living in some god awful nightmare!

From which I never wanted to wake, almost as if I was in a dream state! I had to create a reality that was far greater then mine could ever be, knowing that I could never disappoint me! Feeling angry, like.. all alone.. reminiscing on the times I spent at home.. wanting someone to ease the pain.. the scars so deep, wanting, anyone..someone..to ease the pain..

No one ever did hear those cries.., not one soul knows the pain I see beneath the soul of my eye's,.. still, time has continued to pass me by.. maybe I'll never get to tell how it really was for me.. but that's okay.. I'll keep those wounds locked deep inside of me.. no one will ever know..who..or what.. created this beast, this monster that I swear that only I can see..this monster society has created for me..When will I be free?


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